


Ya'aburnee

by runicmagitek



Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Body Horror, Bullying, Disabled Character, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Families of Choice, Friendship, Gen, Horror, Memories, Mid-Canon, Missing Scene, Needles, The Successor Challenge, time compression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-25 19:53:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20377192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runicmagitek/pseuds/runicmagitek
Summary: The three of them were always there for each other. When Seifer succumbs to Ultimecia, Raijin and Fujin plan to bring him back. Even in time compression. Even if it means they'll be lost forever.





	Ya'aburnee

Fujin was right; Seifer hadn’t been the same for… well, a long time. Perhaps longer than Raijin wished to admit. But they were in one place now. They could leave and go someplace that wouldn’t devastate them like every pit stop throughout life. Despite the protest and reasoning, it fell onto deaf ears.

“It’s too late,” was what Seifer had said.

What a crock of shit.

Raijin paced the cramped paths in that alien structure. Seifer’s last remark ricocheted in his mind. Nothing provided solace—not his frantic steps or drumming fingers against his bicep or his clenched jaw promising a dull headache.

He wanted to scream, wanted to punch something, wanted to return to a point when they could have skipped Garden altogether. The discipline committee was less of a badge of honor and more of a begrudging chore, anyways. There was purpose beyond that—for all of them.

“Tch.” Raijin stilled himself and gazed to the ceiling, wherever it was, and ignored the impending vertigo. “You know what? I’ve had it. I’m done with this place. Maybe Seifer doesn’t wanna hightail it out, but maybe we give him a taste of his own medicine, ya know? Toss him over my shoulder—you can mind his feet or somethin’—and we can get _out_.”

She didn’t say anything. Not that he expected her to speak amidst his rambling; her silence meant she was listening. At least when it was just them. Add a person in their line of sight—stranger or not—and that silence struck something else within her.

“I mean,” Raijin continued, “not that I know _how_ to get out. Guess our ride’s already left, ya know? But we could hitch a ride with that weird spaceship thing Squall and them have? The dragon one. The uh—” He snapped his fingers and groaned as his memory temporarily failed him. “Shit, the… Ragnarok! Yeah, that’s what it was.” He paused. “I think. Well, anyways, whaddya say to us swipin’ our pal and gettin’ the hell outta here? Sounds good, ya know?”

The distinct, ethereal chime within Lunatic Pandora echoed. The foundations whined, yet another dreadful, anachronistic chirp. His eyes flicked about the glossy interior, vibrant opalescent colors shifting as if it were alive. That thought twisted his stomach.

Not as much as the silence thickening between them.

“Fu?” He waited and she offered nothing. Swallowing hard, Raijin pivoted to catch sight of her. “Yo, are ya listen—”

His foot found no firm ground. There wasn’t any. The pathway, the corridors, the closed doors… it no longer existed. Utter blackness greeted Raijin as he fell from his vantage point.

Fear twinged his heart and coated his throat with bile. He drifted in an unknown void, yet none of it disturbed him as much as the disappearance of his friend.

Raijin whipped around, his organs flipping and churning. Shadows enveloped the world. Maybe Fujin hid there, as well. Surely she couldn’t have gone far. She was right _there _and so was he. And he meant what he said; they _were_ going to get the hell out of here.

Together.

“Fu?!” Her name wavered on his tongue. “Fujin! Yo, girl, where are you?!”

Each scream fizzled to a whimper. He still called for her as his mouth ran dry and throat rubbed raw. Raijin hissed and curled into himself. What kind of bullshit sorcery was this nonsense? Was this Seifer’s doing? No, not Seifer—that fucking woman who toyed with him no different than a puppet. That wasn’t Seifer. He wasn’t like that. And like hell Raijin was going to fall for this sorceress mumbo-jumbo.

He flailed in hopes to brush a crack in the facade. “Fujin, come on!” The crumble in his voice… was he crying? Why couldn’t he feel the prickle in his eyes? “I’m not leavin’ without ya!” His heart sunk. “Not then, not now, not _ever_, ya know?!” He barely finished the sentence, half of it dying on his tongue. “Just… just hang on, okay? I’m comin’ for you!”

Wherever she was. Somewhere. She had to be. The Fujin he knew didn’t sit idly while the world passed by.

Unless that bitch captured Fujin, as well, and fashioned her into a hollow shell. The thought elicited a shudder, but thoughts alone didn’t dictate the truth.

The void overwhelmed him, offering no mercy as he seemingly plummeted. Even the silence was tangible with its increasing static ambiance. It struck Raijin’s mind and interrupted his musings. Everything gradually grew louder, thicker, and denser; he swore he swam through ichor lost to midnight.

It dared to suffocate him and rob him of his memories, his purpose. Raijin gagged and thrashed. He couldn’t forget. Not now. If he forgot, then how was he ever getting back?

If she was lost, then so was he. Maybe forever, who knew. Raijin was alright with that fate.

He shook his head and growled. Not yet. He hadn’t placed a damn dent in this search.

He parted his lips to call her name. The word eluded him and then the letters.

She… she had a name, right? But what was it?

Raijin clutched his scalp. “Why can’t I think of it? Why would I ever forget? We… we promised, ya know? I’d forget everything in life, but _you_? Tch, no chance. Let the world forget us, so long as it meant we had each other’s backs.” Weak laughter spilled between shallow breaths. “Remember that, but not you? The hell kind of magic trick is this bullshit?” Raijin screamed. “You damn bitch! Stop messin’ with my friends! You can’t take ‘em away from me! I won’t let ya!”

His friends. That’s right, he had friends. At some point.

Right?

Raijin blinked. The shadow gave way to deep blues and violets found at twilight after dusk. The static yielded to another sound and when salt saturated the atmosphere, he recalled it as the ocean. Shapes peeked through the darkness. Solid earth met his feet. As he adjusted to the lack of light, he absorbed a world he swore was once his.

“Nah, it’s still mine,” he reasoned with himself. “Gonna win it back and all.” He rolled his shoulders and neck until they cracked. “Alright, so what fun and games is this crap?”

He rounded the corner and winced. Golden light spilled from an open window. So did several voices. Holding his breath, Raijin peeked inside.

Children played within. They smiled and skipped with each other and an assortment of toys. Several lamps lit the vast living area, casting gigantic shadows across the wooden floors as children passed. Out of the group, he focused on the one not partaking in any play.

She stood to the side, choppy white hair curling at the ends in dozens of directions. A wad of gauze taped to her face, covering an eye. She shuffled in place and paid little attention to her peers, especially those looming nearby.

Their mouths moved and silence prevailed. They tugged at her hair and shoved her. Then a child dared to rip off the makeshift bandage.

Rage lined Raijin’s blood. He longed to punch the window open, scoop that girl up, and hold her if it meant preventing the world from judging her.

All for someone he didn’t know.

A muted scream broke the laughter. A boy stormed forward and tore the bullies away. Fists flew and whiffed, then slammed into their jaws and noses. An adult—_finally_—marched in to break up to fight, but the damage was already done.

Raijin focused on the little girl doubled over with her head down. “This… is this a dream or somethin’?” He licked his lips while combing his thoughts. “It can’t be. I swear this happened… right?”

Something tugged at his pants. He peered down and his eyes widened.

The little girl stood there with a fist full of cotton fabric and her gaze fixed to the ground.

“H-hey,” Raijin murmured, dropping to her level. “What are ya doin’ out here?”

He failed to catch her gaze and she refused to move or speak.

“Can’t be walkin’ ‘round outside like this. Ya gonna catch a cold or somethin’, ya know?”

She shook her head.

“What, so ya wanna get sick?”

She froze.

“Hey, come on.” Raijin extended his hand. “Let’s get you inside and—”

She released his pants and twitched her hands. Then her lips. “I don’t want to be here.”

Quieter than the distant waves carrying a constant breeze. She was but a whisper in a screaming world, yet it echoed within him and clutched his heart.

“Okay,” he said slowly, “but ya need to go somewhere, ya know? Where do ya—”

“I’m _not_ going back.”

“O-okay, ya don’t need to… um, go back _where_?”

She sighed, the sound more audible than her words. “You know where.”

“I do?”

Her head tipped back. Wind swept pale locks out of her face to reveal the gaping, bruised socket that was her left eye.

“I… I don’t want to feel like this,” she squeaked out.

Raijin could only stare.

Tears welled in her good eye. She raked fingers through her wild hair. Breaths stuttered until she sucked down enough.

“STOP!” she shrieked.

Raijin flinched at the sound multiplying and wrinkling into itself. The girl fragmented with the scenery. Hundreds of thousands of moments played in a vicious cycle—the same instance, yet a little different. She had one eye, then two, then none. She was there and she wasn’t. She smiled and she didn’t. Sentences flowed from her only to have the source severed. And Raijin bore witness to each lifetime, unable to ease her fears.

Even when she laughed like the other children, Raijin suffered knowing that it was a dream.

“This….” He reached for the images flashing by like the facets of a diamond. “This isn’t what happened.”

The scenes slowed to a halt, but the cycles of her voice persisted.

“You can’t save me,” a million childlike voices whispered.

Raijin tensed and ignored the reflex to shudder. “How do _you_ know that?! Besides, it’s not about savin’—it’s about helpin’ each other, ya know?”

A pause, then, “I don’t need your help.” Sinister laughter laced the words. “I don’t _want_ your help.”

The image resumed motion, revolving Raijin in reverse. He buried his face into his palms to shield his eyes; the longer he watched, the more his head pounded. The rapid pulse fluttering in his ears did little to calm the voices ripping apart his mind.

“You were a ball on a chain to drag around,” the voice continued, prodding him until he winced.

“That’s not true!”

“You don’t matter.”

“I _know_!”

Raijin stared up at the blinding prism he was lost in—it made the former abyss bearable. White light engulfed him as a million eyes split and glared. The ocean’s waves abruptly quietened and a pervasive, yet sterile scent washed out the salted air. It reminded him of a million places he didn’t want to be, every instance eluding his memory. Wherever he was now… maybe _this_ was his reality.

“I’ve _never_ been a role model or whatever people expect from me,” he screamed. “I didn’t _want_ to be! All that mattered were my friends and stickin’ together! Didn’t matter where we went or what happened to the world; so long as we were there for each other? Tch, everything else could go to hell, ya know? So yeah, I _don__’t_ matter to a lot of folks, but ya know what? A lot of _them_ don’t matter to _me_! So _ha_! Suck on _that_, why don’t ya?! You can’t go callin’ me a burden when I know for a fact that they wouldn’t think that. I matter to _somebody_. What else is there to prove?”

The light flickered off—one-by-one like stage lights. Darkness returned, yet he swore the splintered images shifted in the shadows. Raijin’s fingers skimmed something and he gasped as solid surfaces warped beneath his palm. He blinked and readjusted to the abrupt transformation. He returned to that old building by the beach… or what was left of it.

The floor hung from the ceiling and the stairs led into the ground. Ceramics and linens meandered, drawn to unknown locations. The ocean replaced the sky and the building imploded and suspended throughout a broken field of flowers and neither the sun nor moon rippled in the endless reflections above.

“Do you remember their names?”

That voice… it no longer belonged to the little girl he attempted to console. He knew it and yet….

“Do you remember your own?”

Raijin growled and spun around to pinpoint the origin of the sound. The question multiplied and cascaded, no different from the lull of the ocean. He wouldn’t submit to these damn _games_—he _couldn__’t_.

“Just bring them back!” Raijin shouted.

“Why?”

“Because….” His fists trembled by his sides. “They need me! We need each other! How the hell else are we gonna get outta here?!”

“Maybe you don’t.”

Water droplets splashed his cheek. Raijin brought his attention skyward and froze. Sections of the oceanic sky broke free and collapsed into the splintered earth. The expanse of water above undulated in an unnatural pattern, spraying him with salt water. Miles of water swallowed the once lovely plain in the distance and rushed towards him. For a second, time stopped.

“Maybe you never will.”

Then the sky collapsed.

He stood his ground and watched. He didn’t bother filling his lungs with a final breath. He didn’t scout for a solution to brave the storm. He stared his fate down, gritted his teeth, and screamed.

Somewhere in that chaotic display, he heard it. A sliver of a sound like a whisper amidst a hurricane. Singular, yet resounding. It was enough to capture his attention. He found nothing along the horizon, save for the ocean rushing to meeting the earth and snuffing out the remaining life, whatever was left to begin with. The water roared and chilled the air; he ignored it to focus on that small sound.

A gentle breeze reserved for summer skimmed his cheek. He held his breath.

Finally, the sound boomed.

“Raijin!”

Swift arms latched onto him. The smaller body connected with his. He recalled a blur of white hair before the ocean claimed them both.

Reality shifted again and deprived him of oxygen, but those arms enveloping him suffocated him the most. Raijin clung back, fearing if he loosened for but a second, the memories restored would vanish as swiftly.

He would lose _her_ again.

And it _was_ her. Despite her face buried in his chest, there was no denying the blue uniform or the eyepatch peeking out from beneath her hair.

He dared to open his mouth and welcomed to thick salt water rushing in—so long as he could say her name.

Just to prove he remembered.

The current drowned out the muted word and flung them through a labyrinth of the world they once knew. He squeezed tighter, unsure of their path or destination. With her there, did it even matter?

She must have heard him, though; she lifted her head enough to meet his panicked gaze—a single, unflinching red eye.

His back broke the surface. Raijin gasped and coughed up water. The ocean shrank beneath them as they floated away. Or were they falling?

“Raijin.”

Such a soft sound. He locked with her gaze, then cackled.

“Fujin! Yo!” They spun through rose-lit clouds as he reveled in her appearance. “I was lookin’ all over the place for you, ya know?”

That delicate eyebrow furrowed. “You weren’t easy to find, either,” she murmured.

“No? Tch, we should try harder next time, ya know?”

“Hopefully, there won’t _be_ a next time.”

“Ya got me there.” The clouds receded until the atmosphere yielded to darkness illuminated by a myriad stars. “So. How ‘bout we skip this joint, ya know?”

“Not yet.”

“No?”

Fujin nestled into him and clung tighter. “We need to find him.”

Her command vibrated within his attire and penetrated skin and bone. Memories bombarded him: of what happened, what might have happened, and what should have happened. No matter the changes, there was always a constant—there was the three of them, always and forever. Raijin hissed in a cold breath and ignored the shiver skittering up his spine. He dropped an arm to search for her hand; Fujin met him halfway. Their fingers interlocked, cool skin against warm.

“Then what are we waiting for?” Raijin teased.

The perpetual spiral amongst the stars abated. Specks of light suspended in the darkness upon landing on invisible ground. Neither Fujin nor Raijin loosened their grip. He surveyed the perimeter, unable to discern where reality began or ended.

“The hell are we gonna find anything in this?” he muttered.

But Fujin stared ahead, unblinking and silent. Then she drew in an audible breath. “Here.”

The light tug against his hand garnered his attention and Raijin followed Fujin’s lead.

“Whatever happens,” Fujin whispered, though her voice nearly screamed in his ears, “don’t let go.”

He couldn’t help but snort. “Alright, mom.”

“_Don__’t_.” She fashioned a glare for him. “I’m serious. This place… it’s not real or natural… but also _is_.”

“Ya think?”

“I _know_, Raij.” Fujin dropped her chin. “And I’m not going to lose you again to this nightmare.”

His smirk eased into a sad smile. “Yeah. I know.”

Either the space froze along with time or the distance was vast enough to exceed their comprehension. Raijin blinked and discovered a star in a different location. The effect rippled amongst the glimmering lights until every star shifted and obscured. Each fell and floated elsewhere like gentle snow dancing in the night.

It almost distracted Raijin from noticing someone else along the path.

A child stood there, a mere silhouette until dim light trailed over his form. Raijin’s eyes widened; he recognized the navy-blue tank top.

“That’s—”

Fujin elbowed his side and skewered him with a glare. Wincing from the blow, he flashed an apologetic smile and looked ahead.

He noticed those sneakers kicking up before the boy disappeared.

With a short inhale, Fujin marched forward. Raijin matched her pace and squinted past the starry snowfall against the black landscape. The boy stood in the distance. Raijin swallowed the urge to call out. As they approached him, another figure loomed to the side. And a third. Fujin hitched her breath and all three kids turned, stared at them, and ran off.

They paused, checking every direction. Raijin licked his lips and defaulted to Fujin’s intuition. Eventually, she continued ahead, veering neither to the left nor the right.

Eight figures emerged. The boys scattered upon Raijin’s and Fujin’s arrival. The cycle repeated and once a hundred children gazed at them, Fujin gritted her teeth and tsked.

“Stop it,” was all she murmured.

She broke out into a sprint and jerked Raijin along. He whipped into stride, ignoring the pain in his shoulder from her abruptness. Well, she said not to let go and he promised her; it was good as done. Raijin wished they never landed in this mess to begin with. Then neither of them would have to hunt each other down in this screwed up reality.

But Seifer? What was needed to secure _his_ fate?

Footsteps shuffled about. The last of the stars descended, bare flickers in comparison to their brilliant kin. Fujin lost momentum and Raijin almost collided into her. The stars faded out of existence upon touching the invisible floor—all but a handful lining a meandering path ahead. At the end, a cluster of stars covered a huddled figure.

Fujin squeezed his hand and he knew.

They approached gingerly, passing fallen stars and ignoring the weight of the atmosphere. Raijin could almost taste the lingering silence—borderline tangible with its newfound density. His heart skipped and bestowed him with paranoia. He reminded himself to breathe after checking behind them five times. It was almost over. Grab the boy and—

Now he bumped into Fujin. He exhaled a curse and stumbled before regaining balance. Fujin shot him a look and rolled her eye, then gazed at the figure. After a beat, so did Raijin.

A pre-pubescent boy curled up on his side on the floor. Blond hair topped his head and yielded to gold against the stars tucked in his locks. He appeared to be sleeping, peaceful and quiet.

Raijin remembered. How could he forget the impulsive punk that welcomed and accepted him?

_We__’re headin’ out, _Raijin mused, afraid if he did so much as breathed the wrong way, the illusion would crumble. _Not to worry. Ya don__’t need to suffer anymore._

Fujin knelt first. Her hand hovered over the boy once Raijin joined her. Pale fingers twitched, hesitant to touch the child. After a deep inhale, she settled her hand upon his shoulder. He stirred and whimpered, but didn’t blink out of sight. Raijin released a breath he didn’t know he held.

“Seifer,” Fujin whispered. “We’re here.” She paused. “We’re going home.”

The boy’s mouth was a frozen, straight line, yet the voice gutted Raijin. “No, you’re not.”

His face tensed. _That__’s… that’s not—_

Shapes darker than the shadows sliced into view—lithe and fluid, almost claw-like. It coiled around the body’s torso and sank into his shoulder. Fujin shuddered against Raijin; whatever hold she had on Seifer subsided as the dreadful figure claimed the child.

Raijin didn’t think; he slammed his free hand on top of hers, pinning it to the kid’s shoulder. “Yes,” he barked, firmer than his grip, “we _are_.”

Fujin swept a glance in his direction, then nodded. Raijin returned the gesture. Their fingers curled into that shoulder.

“You think this to be a game?” the voice continued, a multitude of layered sounds, yet broken all the same. Exactly like this pathetic reality she fashioned. Funny how that worked out. “You have no part in this.” Dozens of dark, inky limbs slithered out from beneath the child to envelope his form. “Leave me the boy and I’ll allow you two to leave unharmed.”

Raijin pried open his clenched jaw for a retort, but Fujin beat him to it. “NEVER!”

He couldn’t help but grin at her outburst. “Yeah, what she said! Either he’s comin’ with us or… well, guess we’re gonna die tryin’, ya know?”

Hundreds of black-clawed hands cupped and stroked the boy’s face, then jerked him back. Both Raijin and Fujin stumbled, yet secured their grip. As for the boy, he parted heavy lids to reveal vibrant cyan eyes. Despite lethargy weighing him down, fear still resided in that gaze.

“Let me go,” he said as black tendrils snaked around his throat.

Who those dead words were meant for—Raijin and Fujin or that messed up sorceress—was beyond Raijin. “Seifer, c’mon, man! This isn’t like you! Ya never wanted this, ya know? Being a knight and all, maybe, but _this_? This isn’t _you_! Never was and never will be!”

Another jerk, another stumble. It did little to faze Fujin. “RELEASE!”

“No.” The child shuddered. “Just… don’t.”

Raijin skidded on his knees, a curse exploding from him as clothing and skin tore open. “Come _on_! Why ya gotta be like this?! Snap out of it already and—”

Every black digit jolted upright and sharped to a fine point. In unison, the myriad needles seized the boy and punctured him. Blood trickled down his cheeks and dripped from his jaw. Those eyes snapped open. So did his mouth, spewing shadowy monstrosities.

“Go _away_!”

His garbled shriek blended with his puppet master’s wail. The remaining stars nestled within the boy flashed bright and revealed a silhouette from behind. Raijin gawked; a behemoth figure loomed above. Countless inhuman limbs spilled from its skirt-like structure as the strobe light in its open face glitched and sputtered like a broken monitor.

“You,” both the boy and that _thing_ said in cacophonous harmony, “do _not_ get to walk away from this.” One last wrest and the boy broke free from Raijin’s and Fujin’s hold. “You… know _nothing_ of his meaning… his purpose… his life.”

Raijin shoved himself upright. “What?! The hell is _that_ load of bullshit?!”

Fujin winced, though followed suit. “RAGE!”

“Oh, we’re _way_ past rage at this point.” He extended a hand to Fujin. Standing together—an arm looped around the other for support as they leaned into one another—Raijin glared and roared. “Who the fuck are ya tellin’ us that we don’t know our man, huh?! You never spent your whole life with him! You never got to experience the shit we did together! You don’t know a _damn_ thing ‘bout Seifer! All _you_ know is how to mess with people’s heads and makin’ them believe they need you, ya know?! Well, guess what—Seifer doesn’t need you! And we’re gonna bring him with us whether ya like it or not!”

The figure lifted its arms—“Oh, _fuck_ me,” Raijin grumbled, “it’s got freaky tentacles _and_ human arms?! Come on, now!”—and lunged for the boy. Half engulfed in the inky appendages, he lurched his head back and retched more shadows. The miasma settled and Raijin coughed, the sound wet and arduous. Fujin merely huffed and flung her free hand upwards.

A violent wind encompassed the area with them as the eye of the storm. The horrific fog lifted. The few remaining stars in the boy’s hair fell and died out. The abomination released a deafening echo akin to metal clawing metal. The wind whipped around the grotesque body and Raijin and Fujin kept walking.

The boy fused into the torso and the black tendrils followed. Only his face, hands, and feet poked out from the undulating blackness. With the wind as a distraction, they managed to reach the bottom of the creature.

“Shit!” Raijin scanned the tremendous height, almost doubled in size. “How the hell are we gettin’ up _there_?!”

Again Fujin flailed her arm. The wind bent to her will and struck from behind. That dreadful wail pierced their ears, though did little else. Gritting her teeth, Fujin struck the air and the wind mimicked her actions. No attack dented the deformed sorceress’ defenses.

The shadow stirred. It swallowed the boy’s visible limbs. Slowly, his face sank into the torso.

Raijin hitched his breath. “Oh, like _hell_ you are!”

With his tight fist, he struck the shadowy limbs at the base. He swiped what felt like liquid, a dense numbness connecting with his knuckles and prickling up his arm. He ignored it, focused, and struck the floor.

Light streaked from his hand. The resounding boom overpowered the monstrous cries. The invisible earth quaked beneath them. Fujin wobbled and Raijin caught her as the perimeter reshaped itself, jutting upwards and bringing them to level with their foe.

Familiar eyes flashed open, then vanished.

They sprinted in sync, neither checking the other—they merely reacted. Raijin’s foot snagged the ledge of their newly formed perch and he leaped. So did Fujin. Soaring forward, they inched closer to the sorceress, to the shadows rotting everything.

To their friend.

Finally, they plunged inside.

Millions of needles stabbed him and left Raijin numb. The cold sensation flowed in waves, each more vicious than the last. He ignored it, despite nausea and dread swelling in his gut, and swam. Fujin still gripped him, sweeping her arm in sync with his to dive deep into this abyss.

“Seifer!” he called out and he barely recognized his muddled voice. Even his guarded thoughts blurred and dissipated. Raijin shook his head to clear what corroded within. “Where are you, man?!”

Fujin assisted in his efforts, but the strength swelling in her tone rubbed threadbare. A fresh wave of icy numbness smashed into them. Fujin trembled as Raijin tucked her into him.

“Don’t forget,” she whispered. “Please… whatever you do, Raij, just… just don’t—”

“Not gonna,” he hissed, the rage directed at the monster responsible for everything than his dear friend. “Don’t you worry.”

She nodded into him; it was enough to urge him on.

Raijin lost sensation in his fingertips first, then his hands. His arms seemingly moved on their own and Raijin ignored the doubt wriggling between his heartbeats.

Warm skin faded from his grasp before he cried, “Seifer, we need you!”

How long were they submerged in this hell? Memories vanished. Whatever purpose guided them thus far teetered on a fine line. The energy fueling his pursuit waned not due to its absence, but because of hesitance, then finally apathy.

A smudge of gold flashed into view; it was enough of a spark to revive Raijin’s determination.

He squinted. “Is that—”

“No time to ask,” Fujin grumbled.

He moved somehow, feeling like a voyeur within a hollow shell than a participant. The gold color returned in shorter bursts. Then a face emerged.

The one they were looking for.

He couldn’t remember his name or where they were or why it mattered, but he _knew_ he had to find him. That was their ticket home. Simple as that. His fingertips ghosted that scarred face. Just a little bit closer.

They latched on; beneath the shadowy veils was a body belonging to a full-grown man. He didn’t move when they tugged. Raijin tried again, hoping his deadened hand latched onto something. Movement tempted his curiosity. The darkness swirled around them.

Then the pain disintegrated the numbness.

Raijin and Fujin screamed.

“So,” that horrible voice dared to rupture blood in their ears, “you’ve decided your fate. You wish for something worse than death; you wish to erase your existence.”

Raijin ignored the threats. Fujin opted for her usual silence, though anxiety didn’t riddle her features while trying to pry the body free; there was a blend of spite and pride contorting her features.

“Very well,” the voice rumbled in his mind, decimating and multiplying; the reverberations roused nausea. “As you wish.”

Claws latched onto his face and sunk through flesh. It wheedled past muscles and into veins. Agony trickled into him and in its wake a biting paralysis, more intense and terrible than previously. Raijin fluttered his eyes. Was he holding on? What about Fujin? He no longer saw her or the one they needed to save. Nothing skimmed his hands, but perhaps that was a mind trick, yet again. It didn’t stop him from trying.

It didn’t stop him from screaming and heaving his friend out from that bitch’s clutches.

Silence overwhelmed everything. What broke it eclipsed every shriek in existence, blurring reality until it warped and shattered.

Warmth returned to Raijin’s form. The body loosened; he _felt_ it.

Seifer nearly plummeted past them, but Raijin darted forward to catch him. Another pair of hands clamped over his; Fujin peeked out from the opposite side, clinging to both boys as they fell.

But the darkness trembled on its foundations. It rippled and flaked away along with the sorceress responsible for it. What remained of her—that dreadful form—was but a smudge on a black canvas as they drew further apart.

Then the noise faded and colors returned. It bled into the deteriorating black landscape to paint a new reality. Only then did Raijin realize they were no longer falling; they were curled up on a bridge stretching the span of the ocean.

He held his breath. Was that it?

Blue skies loomed above. Clouds rolled by and the cry of gulls blended with the ocean. Flower petals marked the pristine day with a smattering of pastels. Several floated to Raijin and found a home against his face.

“Hey,” he murmured, “we’re alive… yeah?”

Shifting in place, he caught sight of Fujin tucked into Seifer. She lifted her head and blinked, surveying their surroundings slowly. Not once did she loosen her vice grip on Seifer or Raijin.

“This….” Her eye widened. “This is… we’re here.” Yet she didn’t smile; her attention flicked to Seifer.

Raijin shifted and scanned him. Still wearing that beat-up old jacket like always. Same scar, same slicked-back hair. It was Seifer, alright, but whether he made it….

“Yo.” Raijin nudged him. “Seifer, you in there?” He prodded again. “Hey, wake up, sleepyhead. We’re back, ya know?” Raijin furrowed and furiously shook him. “If this is some kinda joke, now’s the time to—”

A loose fist backhanded Raijin’s cheek. He winced and swatted away the attack. Upon regaining his senses, he froze. Fujin smiled.

And Seifer groaned and rolled onto his back.

“Fuck,” he managed to say while hacking up a lung. Salt water bubbled past his dry lips. Wiping himself clean, Seifer sighed and squinted. “My head is killing me.”

Raijin and Fujin pounced him in unison. Raijin’s laughter rang to the heavens while Seifer tried to give them hell despite getting the wind knocked out of him.

* * *

Part of him didn’t believe it. Fresh, salty air filled his lungs, the cool breeze rolled off the ocean, and the sun warmed his skin, yet Raijin waited for that darkness to swallow him whole. He shuddered in those moments and dropped his gaze while perched against a wooden railing. He tried to focus on the distant conversations of fishermen, dock workers, and civilians—anything to anchor him in the moment.

The dread faded from his mind and soul. He breathed easy, albeit with sweat lining his brow.

“Hey.”

He never noticed the light footsteps approaching him nor the light jab at his bicep. That voice sobered him up, jerking back with a hitch in his throat. As for Fujin, her soft gaze passed zero judgment.

“Yo!” he coughed up along with a chuckle. “Don’t go sneakin’ up on me, ya know?”

She shrugged, the quirk in her lips enough of a good omen to leave Raijin grinning.

“So.” Clapping his hands together, he eyed the assortment of goodies in the basket she clung to her chest. “Whaddya got?”

Fujin scanned the contents. “Hopefully everything we need for fishing,” she said, quieter than before. “I don’t get why this is a good idea.”

“Well,” Raijin said, “keeps us occupied, ya know? If we’re gonna be stuck here for a while, might as well make the most of it.”

She raised an unamused eyebrow. “The most of it?”

“Yeah, like… do stuff that the locals would do, ya know?” Well, _now_ it was sounding better in his head than out loud. “I dunno, Fu. Just tryin’ to keep spirits high and stuff, ya know?”

At least she nodded. “I wish circumstances were better.”

“Hey.” He looped an arm around her and tugged her in for a hug. “We’ll get through this. People will get over the sorceress bullshit and forget we were ever involved.”

“And if they don’t?”

“Tch, tough luck. We’re not lettin’ them get any of us. Not me, not you—”

He paused, recalling the obsessive rants and sadistic acts he witnessed his friend commit. But no, that wasn’t _him_. The whole world could point fingers and dump the blame on him, but they didn’t _get_ it; that wasn’t the guy he grew up with. And honestly, it was better that Seifer didn’t remember the atrocities in his wake while under a sorceress’ control. After the hell they endured, even before they signed up for the road to becoming a SeeD, they _all_ deserved solace.

If that meant staying out of the public’s eye forever, then so be it.

After a deep breath, he continued, “And definitely not Seifer.”

Fujin nodded into him. “I… I don’t want to lose him again.”

“We’re not gonna.”

“But I can’t help but think… the sorceress from the future….”

“What about her?”

She met Raijin’s gaze. “She’s dead, right?”

He hated how he hesitated. “I sure as fuck hope so.”

Bitter amusement brought a smile to Fujin. “I worry that… this isn’t _it_. Maybe this is some interim between the life we knew and… whatever _that_ was that we experienced.”

“Well, then here’s hopin’ we don’t wake up from this pretty dream, ya know?”

Fujin smiled—something small, albeit genuine—and looked to the horizon.

Raijin scouted the docks; still no sign of Seifer, but he was adamant on going alone to begin with. Who was Raijin to deny his friend some room to clear his head? That didn’t satiate the paranoia, though. _It__’s alright,_ he reminded himself, almost as a chant. _We__’re gonna be fine. It’ll work out. It’s gotta. We’ve made it this far already, so what’s another_—

“Raij?”

He blinked and cocked his head. Fujin leaned into him and tightened her hold on their fishing supply basket, but it was that melancholic expression washing over her which gripped his heart.

“Yeah, what’s up?” he offered.

She didn’t respond at first; she rarely did in those moments.

“When we were gone,” she began slowly, “you know… not here or… _anywhere_… where did you go?”

He wished he didn’t understand her question, but the skitter in his pulse said otherwise. “Whaddya mean, Fu?”

Frustration laced her sigh. “I swear I trekked thousands of miles to find you, and yet… when I did—” She flicked her focus to him. “—it was where I started, like I hadn’t left.”

Hundreds of questions screamed for his attention, but he didn’t dare breathe them to life. Not all of them. He knew better than to do that with her by now. Still, if what she was saying was true and if that hellhole brought out similar things in both of them, then—

“Fujin?” he said, making sure only _she_ heard him. “What did you see before you found me?”

Silence again. Her eye drifted from him. “It was the orphanage, back when I first arrived.”

He nodded, more for himself than for her. “Yeah, you and me both.”

“I… honestly can’t remember if what the kids said were even true.”

“Tch, they liked makin’ up shit to hear themselves talk. All a buncha hot air. Might as well blow it outta their—”

“No, that’s not what I meant.” She paused, tensing in his embrace. “What the kids said _then_, when I was lost… I don’t know if it was a memory of mine or my own fears manifesting something new.”

He wished he had an answer for her.

“But it made me think of when I _was_ little,” she continued, “and unable to find my voice.” She scoffed. “Kids say the harshest things about crap they don’t understand: I was abused; I was neglected; I was born this way; I did this to myself; I was a freak.” Fujin shook her head. “The only truth was that I was abandoned, like everyone else.” Another long pause, then, “But you never made me feel unwelcome; you made me feel safe.”

She was right. About the kids and the horrible lies they wove, but also about them. He didn’t care if she was missing an eye or if she supposedly swallowed her tongue and rendered herself mute; he cared that she didn’t shove him away or tell him to shut up when he rambled. Raijin spoke and Fujin listened. Two broken children deprived of a sense of home and finding comfort in each other’s company.

Eventually, she talked. Only to him, only in hush tones. And when anxiety strangled her in situations where she was forced to speak, she screamed because she didn’t know how else to exist. Raijin never judged her for that; if anything, he encouraged it. Let the whole damn world be afraid of the screaming woman who experienced enough in a short span than any of them would ever encounter in a lifetime.

He admired that bravery, envied it at times. When he first told her that, before they moved to Balamb Garden, she laughed.

“_I__’m not brave,_” she had murmured. “_This is my life; I have no other choices._”

“_But ya wake up every day knowin__’ that and keep on goin’, ya know?_” Raijin nudged her until she cracked a smirk. “_That__’s worth somethin’._”

She looked at him then as if nothing else mattered. “_So do you, Raij. We both do._”

After that, the thought of life without her was a life not worth living; she instilled strength in him he otherwise lacked. And if what she said was true—which was always—then the feeling was mutual.

“You made me feel that, too,” Raijin said, a bittersweet smile lining his features. “Could never forget that.”

“Yeah,” Fujin agreed. “It’s what led me to you in that nightmare.”

“Pretty sure it’s what brought the three of us together.”

As if on cue, a sharp whistle pierced the ocean’s white noise. They broke their gaze to trace the origin; Seifer ambled down a rickety, wooden staircase with a few fishing poles resting on his shoulder.

“And here I thought you two ditched me,” Seifer called out.

Raijin grinned and loosened his hold on Fujin. “Nah! Gonna take a lot more than that to scare us off. ‘Sides, what took _you_ so long?!”

“What?” Seifer slowed for a second and blinked. “You kidding me? Do you know how damn long it takes to rent a bunch of fishing poles around here? You think that would be a walk in the damn park for a place called Fisherman’s Horizon, but _guess not_.”

“Well, I mean—” He glanced at Fujin’s assortment of supplies. “—Fu didn’t really have any problems with—”

“Yeah, no shit! She just glares at people until they get crap done!”

Fujin twitched her lips. Raijin snorted.

“He’s not _wrong_,” he mumbled.

She sighed. “I guess.”

“The hell are you two whispering about?!” Seifer yelled, gradually closing the distance between them.

Fujin shrugged and headed towards to docks. As for Raijin, he waited for Seifer to catch up. “Eh, nothing new. The usual, ya know?”

Once closer, the brilliant spark in Seifer’s eyes matched his slight smile. “Good. Kind of sick and tired of things outside of the norm.”

“Tell me about it.” He took two fishing poles from Seifer and headed to the docks, matching his stride. “Could get used to the same old, same old, ya know?”

“Status quo and all?”

“Somethin’ like that.”

A slight chuckle fluttered out of Seifer. “Sans Garden and SeeD and that bullshit, though.”

“Never really suited us, anyways, ya know?”

“Oh, and _fishing_ does?”

“Yo, I’ll take a whole damn life of fishin’ if it means we don’t have to relive any of that shit!”

Seifer bellowed with hearty laughter. Nothing sadistic laced that sound. When was the last time Raijin heard that?

“Yeah,” Seifer said, soft words marked with something Raijin couldn’t place—something lost between nostalgia and detachment, “you and me both.”

He never bothered asking Seifer what had happened in that place between reality and nonexistence. The events echoed in Raijin, but as for what Seifer remembered? That wasn’t his place to pry and unearth. Did it matter anymore? They were free from everything which chained them. No more sorceresses, no more military nonsense, and definitely no more SeeD exams for them to fail.

And no more home. But it had always been like that, one way or another. Maybe no place would suit them, but if they had each other, then the location was mere scenery highlighting good memories in the making. Just like the ridiculous fishing venture in the middle of nowhere on a crystal-clear day. Seifer struggled to catch a damn thing, Raijin struck gold whenever he cast his line, and Fujin inevitably shoved him into the water for flailing yet another damn fish in her face. Nothing was perfect. It never would be. Just like them.

Just how he wanted it.

**Author's Note:**

> Ya'aburnee—meaning "you bury me"; wishing that a loved one outlives you because of how unbearable life would be without them.


End file.
